I'LL HAVE A "TRIAL AND TRIBULATION COCKTAIL"( With a LITTLE LESS VERMOUTH)

One of the benefits of being self-employed is that I can take a day off pretty much when I want( God had to heal me before I found this out- I used to think I had to work ALL the time- more about this in another blog).. so the othe rday I took a day off and took my son John Calvin to the local Jr. College so that he could SEAL the DEAL-he took the entrance exam, convinced the Religion professor that Presbyterians named John Calvin are kinder, gentler calvinists, and he filled out a ton of paperwork.. SO I think he got in... !!! While all this was going on, I decided to go to the local chickfila and Chill.. and relax.... or as the young people say," CHILLAX"( Those young people better stay off my lawn, I hear em talking and I have picked up some weird words from them) so there I was enjoying my coffee, chillaxin and in walks one of my good friends- he is a teaching Elder( ok my Baptist buddies- He's a PASTOR).. and we talked about all the wonderful things that God is doing in the life of his church!! AND we talked about the challenges.. ministry is HARD WORK... we need to pray for those that shepherd the local flocks... so I prayed for my friend before we said goodbye- we prayed for each other- our prayers were kind of similar. We thanked God that He is our Father, we thanked Him for HIS blessings .. and then.... we downed a HUGE GLASS OF THE HARD STUFF- yep... we asked God to "REMIND US THAT EVERYTHING WE GO THROUGH IS USED BY HIM TO MAKE US STRONGER IN OUR FAITH.. and let me tell you something... those"thankful for trial and tribulation cocktails " kinda burn going down.. they taste yucky- we do'nt deal with hardship very well9 Hey Lord, It's kinda uncomfortable here.. could I have a pillow, and one of those coconut drinks with a little umbrella?).. so I drove away feeling REAL spiritual- FAST FORWARD TO NEXT DAY- I am trying to get started on new project in Newnan, drive to get material, get to Newnan, discover I LOST my phone, drive back to ALL the places I had been that morning, looked for phone- didnt find phone-wentto AT&T place to get NEW phone, couldnt get phone because my NAME is NOT on account, called Maria to come to AT&T, Got new phone, went outside to see ANTIFREEZE pouring from my truck- went to Parts store, got part, went back to fix truck, I am trying to put on new hose and HUGE rainstorm crashes down on me, I am soaking wet( Baptizoed??).. I jump inside truck.. and all of a sudden I see an image in my mind- It's me and my Friend at the chickfila, praying for each other, and the first thing I think is this: " IF I GET THIS TRUCK FIXED, I AM GOING TO MY FRIEND'S HOUSE AND PUNCH HIM IN THE NOSE.. and HOPE HE PUNCHES ME BACK....What were we thinking?? what were we praying??? well.. then I started laughing uncontrollably... now I mean LAUGHING.. not a "sniker" not a "chortle"- I am talking FULL BLOWN laughter..it was HOLY LAUGHTER, see my charismatic friends, you ai'nt got nothin on us baptised, catechised,sanctified presbyterians.. we got Holy laughter too.. and It's all because GOD SHOWS up when our vehicle breaks down and we are stranded, He shows up when we lose our phone with all our business contact numbers, He shows up when we are caught in a rainstorm, or a LIFESTORM- the REAL ONE, you know when the bad test result comes back from the lab, when there is not enough money to pay the bills, in THOSE storms there is'nt any laughter... but He still shows up , He taps us on the shoulder and says:: I will NEVER leave You,All things work together for good for those that love me,Nothing can separate us from the Love of Christ"I will comfort you like a mother comforts her child"... these promises are ours... we have to TRUST HIM, HE will susutain us- He "proved" His love for us more than 2000 years ago- the tomb is empty-whatever HE tells us, we can believe... for sure.. and Oh yeah- NEXT TIME I have a little time to kill, I am going to hang out at Waffle House- all the "name itand claim it" preachers hang out there...

SARAH PALIN- 100% GUILTY AS CHARGED!

I 've been thinking( I know what YOU are thinking- uh oh.. NOT AGAIN) and I have decided that Sarah Palin is GUILTY- yep.. I said it... I mean come on... ALL the media attention on the Governor of Alaska?? She HAS to be guilty.. and when the prestigious MSNBC tells me that she's guilty.. something has to be going on..So .. I did some thinking and I have come to the conclusion that INDEED SARAH IS GUILTY.. so Now That I've got her in my courtroom.. I'm going to do me some "charging" and "pronouncing" ( and later some Ciphering)-here goes:





I Charge Sarah Palin(hereafter referred to as SP) with the crime of believing in The Triune God of the Universe who has revealed Himself in The Savior of the World- Jesus Christ


I charge SP with believing in the sanctity of Marriage and showing her belief by being married to the SAME man for all these many years



I charge SP with being 100% pro-life- she loves her children- and she chose to allow her Downs child to live, when other women in her position would have opted for an abortion



I charge SP with the hideous crime of loving her daughter that conceived a child out of wedlock, for encouraging a culture of Life, and displaying unconditional love in a challenging situation



I charge SP with the unspeakable acts of working hard, getting an education, wanting to serve her community and her state, looking for ways to save taxpayers money,and in additon to these barbarous acts- she has the unmitigated gall of reminding all public servants that they work FOR the PEOPLE!



I charge SP with believing that the God that she worships created the world and everything in it- for this unspeakable crime- she must surely be held accountable



I charge SP with holding the archaic belief that TRUTH is NOT relative

I charge SP with "shaking up" the status quo, enraging the liberal media, shocking the GOP, angering the pundits, confusing Karl Rove, Mike Huckaby, Charles Krauthammer, and ALL the others,and turning the political world upside down

I charge SP with "connecting" with AMERICA, being epistemologically self-concious( ok.. philosophy majors- do your homework), and becoming a thorn in the side of SO MANY who HATE HER

I charge SP with being a bright and shining star- a breath of fresh Air

I, therefore, in light of all the evidence , do find Sarah Palin 100% Guilty as Charged-

whats the 'SENTENCE" going to be??? well..... we shall see.... we shall see...

THANATOPSIS REVISITED( or- THRILLER WAS A GREAT ALBUM- no matter what)

If you happen to be living on planet earth, you probably have noticed that LOTS of so-called celebrities are dying... and how could you NOT NOTICE?We are being bombarded with news of EVERY DETAIL of their lives.. or should I say deaths.. isnt it strange.???.Human beings die..we are ALL headed in that "direction".. but we act like something unusual has occurred.." He( or she, ) has died... THAT ca'nt be!!! Well... YES IT CAN... part of the shock is our deification of anyone that we have EVER seen on our TV screen .. - We expect our "stars"and "idols" to be super - human.( you mean the guy that did the "moon walk" could really die?). yep thats part of it.. but MOST of it comes down to this- When one of our "idols" dies, we are reminded of our mortality... and THAT makes us uncomfortable.. we do'nt want to think about it... the really strange thing is that we NEED TO BE UNCOMFORTABLE SOMETIMES.. yep, I said it( Ok, my hedonist friends, you know I love ya- but I gotta break it down for ya).. when we are uncomfortable, or faced with difficulty, tragedy, tribulation,sadness, obstacles_________-( insert your yucky situation here in the space provided)- we tend to DO A LOT of thinking.. now I know that morbid introspection is not healthy.. but sometimes we need to THINK about what's important! The late theologian Greg Bahnsen in his last sermon put it this way:" Death helps to focus the mind"He also used the sermon to talk about those that live their lives in defiance of God, those that have no regard for spiritual things:Cornelius Van Til said, " In vain they seek to die the death of the righteous".. what does this mean??? - that the unbeliever seeks to die the death of the righteous?? I think it means this: They are grasping for SOME MEANING to existence; they are looking desperately for something that validates their life.. you know what I am talking about... " Yeah, Michael Jackson was pretty messed up with those kids, he hated who he really was, he thought that he could be fulfilled by living a Disneyland existence... but HEY He was an AWESOME singer, dancer, and he sold MILLIONS of albums..." Do you see what we do??? we look for something to hang onto.. some goodness.. some virtue... some accomplishment that gives meaning to everything they did...but we do so in VAIN... because this game of stacking up their good deeds on one side of the scale- and their bad deeds on the other.. it never works.. and deep in our heart of hearts , we KNOW this... We still feel empty and sad when we think about our idols leaving this earth.. no matter how many times we listen to "Off the Wall", we are unfulfilled.. we are still faced with the awful truth, that one day the Bell will toll for us... but we can have hope.. we can die the "death of the Righteous" it's NOT OUR righteousness, it is given to us by a Gentle Sheperd who washes us with His blood, and clothes us with HIS righteousness- it's not about any GOOD WORKS that we do... it's about what HE has DONE on the cross. He offers you this FREE gift...and remember.. " Death be not proud though some have called thee mighty and dreadful, but thou are not so..."(I wonder if John Donne ever danced, I wonder if HE ever did the "moonwalk" ... I will ask him when I see him.. because ONE DAY I will meet Donne.. IN ANOTHER LAND... NOT NEVERLAND- it's really FOREVERLAND!)